Welcome back to our blog 1Beginner!
Welcome back to another Beginner’s perspective series. Volume-6.
Today’s Perspective – The Ultimate Help from difficult people!
In my journey of 10 years in a career , I learned the most profound things when I was not comfortable & I wasted whole my time when i was comfortable. Too many of us go through such situation like me but I am not sure how many of manage to accentuate what I am about to share. I am not acting as if I am somebody but I feel very proud that I managed to get perspective/learning only because of my New view philosophy.
The view I am sharing today is –
Sometimes the people who are not helping you (or bothering you) are helping you in a best way! How? By making you Strong and Self-Reliant! Of course in the long run and are you patient enough to learn and go though that process? They are helping you build an proficient version of You, provided you are willing to make the right choices not the comfortable and obvious ones! Just Take a break for a moment, look within and Think different!
You would find the problems in you when you look inside and when you try to find them outside you find that in another people.@ Mahendra Kapady.
We All Go Through The Discomfort!
We all live with people, we all work with people for people. So, having differences in between us is quite obvious. You must be loosing your cool, facing some problems or difficult time in you family, office or in neighborhood or somewhere else. It can be because of your boss, your family member, your not so good colleague, your love-hate sort of friend, your annoying neighbor or anyone in society. Instead of cursing them for your situation, Hold on for a while, give your critical and cribbing mind a break. Take a deep breath and see if you can change your perspective and think in a different way. See, How they would be helping you to grow despite continuing their not so good or unacceptable actions!
For me I really loved my 3 bosses who bothered me a lot in my 10 years of my career, including my existing boss. They pissed me off for a while and made me restless throughout the period but they taught me a lot. How & What ?
- My first boss taught me how to lead by example! How to manage big team of size 30, I was 25 & told to mange team of 30 members, who were having experience more than my age! I was not that comfortable and thinking how I am going to do it? He gave me a time for a while and started running behind me and made me run here and there and He kept doing that until I started doing the things on my own without any push! Thank God he made me run, else I could have turned lazy doing nothing. I did manage the team well with a different approach for about 3+ years and those people still love me the way I deal with them.
- My another boss taught me the importance of meeting timelines, keeping the positive references and ignoring the negative ones completely.
- My current boss is teaching me too many things. He has taught me The excellence over the Attitude, The necessity of digging deeper, Taking ownership & Most importantly to finish what You start! (By the way He is still behind me and making me uncomfortable as I am not completely mold and there is lot of scope for improvement.)
- There are another kind of people who helped me a lot to improve my attitude (I am not perfect and I am still work in progress) There are extremely pessimistic/negative people who I worked with and many of them are still surrounded to me. and I cant help it but to learn from them and what they really taught me? How not to deal with people and bad approach of living the life. Bottom line is – I learned from them How Not To Be!
My life example- I have been driving for about 4 years now and driven beyond 100000 kms. Today, I have improved my temperament a lot over the years thanks to the abusive and nasty drivers. While driving the commuters who unnecessarily abuse me, cut me off and stare at me, offer me a good opportunity to watch my breath, practice my patience and dissolve the negative emotions. I am very thankful to them as they are offering me a platform to get aware about my emotions and practice patience.
So, Pause for a while and see, What new qualities you can imbibe in you while going through the same situation! You can either abuse/curse them or crib about them or you can be entirely opposite i,e be calm, composed (an analytical about your existence) i.e by not feeding them what they want. So, you can become an outstanding example of A Class Apart Personality!
& I strongly believe – the people who like you or love you offer simply help to you but Difficult people offer you the ultimate help by not helping you!
-Written by Mahendra Kapady@2019, All Rights Reserved.